Rowan Tree Foundation Butterfly Release

Carson and Jade

Carson and Jude.

This photo is represents me alot. Part of the petals are missing from the flower and that is exactly how my heart is. Part of my heart because Grace is not here with us. It is something that I have learned to live with and deal with on a day to day basis.

I had this tile made for my cousins who both lost children. Cathy and Darryl lost Magdalene, Mary, Michael and Martin. Dasha lost Kolby. The four pink and yellow gerber daisies represent Cathy and Darryl's babies and the single yellow Gerber daisy is for Kolby.

I hate that we have to have a memorial wall for our children but I am so glad that we have a place to go. I don't know what I would have done without all the women I have met on my journey. They are all amazing people and I have become friends with several of them. I really enjoy seeing where we have come from and how we are doing now. My core group has since had children and I love seeing them play together.

Grace's 3rd Angel Day

Today is Grace's 3rd Angel Day and it was very peaceful. I went and got a massage this morning and then Brian, Carson and I went to eat at Cracker Barrel and then the Butterfly Pavilion. Grace was going to have butterflies and flowers in her room and I kept the meaning after she died. Little did I know that her life was just like a butterfly. Come into your life very briefly, but leave footprints and a huge impact on all of us. I can not get the pictures to load so I will try again tomorrow.

Membership Campaign

The following is from a friend of mine's blog- Corinne. She is a awesome person and friend. I can't tell you how much she has helped me through the loss of Grace and is always there to listen to me when I have a hard day. Corinne started a non-profit in honor of her daughter Rowan here in Colorado. She not only helps those here but also around the world. Please help join the campaign and help support Rowan Tree. We are having a Butterfly Release on June 27th and do numerous other events throughout the year! Please join!!


Hi everyone,

Please help us raise awareness for the work we are doing at Rowan Tree Foundation. We are working hard to reach 1,000 members on facebook, and can do it with your help.

Child death happens every single day, all over the world. Given the magnitude of occurrences, you'd think there would be equal levels of support responses from the communities of the world. You'd think that all medical professionals from obstetrics to peds would have had training in compassionate care-giving for the circumstances where a child dies. The reality is that its the luck of the draw as far as how your medical team is able to support you in your grief.

Rowan Tree Foundation is an all volunteer organization that works to support families after the death of a child during pregnancy, or after they are born. Isolation accompanies this sort of loss, and parents and friends need to know there is a place they can go to be heard, to read, to connect, and most of all, to realize they are not alone.

We're working this summer to increase our reach around the globe, and one of the ways we are connecting to new folks is through facebook. Please join our cause, and if you do not use facebook, go to our website at www.RowanTreeFoundation.org and subscribe to our newsletter. (We do not send spam or share your info.)

Coming in July we are having a contest giveaway that you're going to want to be in on. So, join us, and help spread the word.

Thank you!

Grace's name in the sand

I had this done for Grace. I found this website from a friend and she had her twins names done in the sand. I absolutely love it!! You can visit the website from the link below.

http://namesinthesand.blogspot.com/2009/03/grace-addison.html

Simply Amazing!

This quilt was made on Grace's 1st angel day by some special friends who helped us along our journey the first year. Each one of the squares was made with love and I truely cherish each and every person who has helped us along our journey.

National Grief Week

This is National Grief week and I would like for everyone to remember all who are not here with us now. I miss Grace everyday and think about her every minute of the day. I so wish she were here to play with Carson and fight with each other. It is so hard to lose a child because it just never gets easier. I will always have apart of my heart missing. The poem below is something that I got from one of my MISS mommies.

You can shed tears that she is gone,
Or you can smile because she lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that she will come back,
Or you can open your eyes and see all that she has left.
Your heart can be empty because you can't see her,
Or you can be full of the love that you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday,
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember her and only that she is gone,
Or you can cherish her memory and let it live on.
You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back,
Or you can do what she would want.
Smile, open your eyes, love and go on

~David Harkins

I really love this poem because Grace has made a huge impact in my life. I truly feel that I am a better person because of her.

Grace's angel day

We survived the day! I can't believe that it's been two years since we lost Grace. It seems like yesterday and it feels like we should be planning her funeral. I'm sure people want to know when a parent will "get over it" but really what happens is we learn to "live and deal" with our new life.

I think of all the things we have missed out on and dream of what she would be doing. I'm sure she would be walking, getting into everything and just being a girly girl!! We miss her so much! I know she was with us today because it was so awesome. The weather was great and the balloon release was gorgeous. Brian, Carson and I met Suzanne, April, Corinne, Jill and Jenny out at the statue and did the balloon release. I have met all of these amazing people since we lost Grace and they have been so supportive and listened to me cry. They have also been very supportive of our adoption. The many ups and downs of this year have been very emotional for both Brian and I.

After the balloon release Brian, Carson and I went and had lunch and then we came home and put up the Christmas decorations. Grace has her own Christmas tree and it is on top of the TV console. A butterfly is on top of the tree with all of the decorations that I've made her every year. We make Christmas decorations at our MISS meeting in December and I cherish these dearly. I will post pictures soon!!

Thank you to all who have been there for us!! We couldn't have made it without the love and support from our family and friends!!

Remembering Grace

Today we had The Walk to Remember at Clement Park in Colorado. As most of you know we lost Grace in 2006 and I'm apart of a group of bereaved parents who help raise funds to give bereavement packages to hospitals. This is something very dear to me! I am so thankful that we received a package when we lost Grace. The information and support was amazing. I have made some awesome friends who are friends for life in this circle. It sucks that this is where you meet some of your best friends but they are awesome and so supportive.

My mom, Brian, April, Kim and I participated in the walk this year. April and her family have been so amazing in the support that they have given Brian and I. We are very thankful to have them in our lives. They love Carson just as much and his Auntie April can't get enough of him!!

Here are some pictures from today. We did a balloon release and it was breathless. Enjoy!!